Mom shaming: Mom's Sharing Their Experience with Mom Shaming

For some reason, people think parents are just fair game to have to listen to anything that spews out of their mouth. Just blatant judgment seems to come with the territory. From the moment a mom gets pregnant, there is someone questioning what they eat, what they drink, how they'll deliver. Then the child is born and someone has something to say about where they sleep and for how long, what they are eating, just about everything. 

My most memorable shaming was once in Walmart. My youngest is easily overstimulated. We don't get out much because of it. She was just under a year old and I ventured out to do a little grocery shopping. I tried following her cues and went straight to the self check out the moment she started getting the tiniest bit antsy. Well, it just wasn't quick enough. I could hold her and check out at the same time, so she was sitting in the buggy crying (screaming really because she never "just cries"). An older lady with two teens was beside me and says loud enough for EVERYONE in the self-checkout to hear, "Can someone shut that baby up!" I was in utter shock! The teens looked at me with sympathy in their eyes, obviously embarrassed themselves. I just wanted to abandon our things and walk out before I started to cry, but I toughed through, finished checking out, and then cried in the car.

Basically every mom I know has experienced some kind of shaming that could they could only respond by walking away, staring blankly, or just crying, then wishing they'd asked: "Did you seriously just say that?"  Most of the time we as parents really have not idea how to deal with this and end up just feeling ashamed.  Here are 19 different situations where moms were mom-shamed:

Yelling at a person in Walmart for reaching in the cart towards my baby. They pulled his blanket back and I went mama bear on them. The cashier told me I didn’t have to be so rude. 😅😅😅
-Kalifornia





Wearing my 2-month-old son at the grocery store when I should have “kept him in the car seat”

-Nikki

For not breastfeeding.  People are a**holes
-Latisha

For breastfeeding my son until he was a year... I was told to stop at 3 months
-CaeLyn

I got called gross for breastfeeding... At the ZOO WITH ANIMALS THAT BREASTFEED
-Brit

"For not cutting my youngest hair. She said I’m only confusing him to thinking he’s a girl. So I literally told the lady to f*ck off."
-Maria

"One day my anti-vaccine and anti-GMO neighbor was at my house with her kids. At snack time she asked, 'Oh, you let her eat that? We only eat organic. I prefer not to put poison in my kid's body, but we all have our own ways, I guess.' I responded by laughing and saying, 'We sure do!'
-Alex

"One time my father-in-law took my husband aside and expressed a concern that I was 'turning our son gay' by getting him a play kitchen for his second birthday. I couldn't respond, because my husband told me after it happened. We definitely limited his contact after that."
-Susan

"I have a son with Tourette Syndrome. A family member told me I needed to beat him more or he'd never act right, and that I'm too soft and let him get away with acting that way. As if his tics were something he could control. I've developed the skill of staring blank-faced."
-Jenny

"I'm a stay-at-home mom. I've been told, 'You're lucky your husband lets you stay home and do nothing all day, and spend all of his money.' I had no response. Seriously. What do you say to that?"
-Karen

"I took my daughter to church the first time when she was 9 days old. Someone said, 'Oh, she's so beautiful, what a shame you had to have a c-section, didn't you want to wait and try?' Um, yeah, I did, but my daughter had her heart rate bottom out, and my cervix being stuck at one centimeter kind of made that not a possibility. I'll take my live daughter, thanks. I hate when they start with a compliment and then smack you with stupid."
-Danielle

"One day, a woman at the store said, 'He's so cute" (about my baby). I responded, 'Thank you, I think she looks really good in blue, don't you?' The woman replied, 'She? It's a girl? Why would you dress it in blue if it's a girl?' I thought, WTF, lady, yes, she is wearing blue. Don't call my baby it."
-Anna

The worst was this nurse at the hospital during my second miscarriage who told me that God was taking my babies away from me due to my being a lesbian. It was the same hospital where they refused to allow my partner in the ultrasound room because of homophobic bullsh*t. I didn't really deal. I mean, we left as soon as they gave me meds and all that, but we also switched after that to a midwife practice."
-Jenny

I had my first child by c section and when I was given a choice for either a VBAC or repeat c section for my second child I chose another c section l. I was told I'm taking an easy way out and I didn't really give birth.

-Lia

I extend breastfed till 2 and people constantly tried to sham me. But I still did it 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️💁🏽‍♀️💁🏽‍♀️

-Jessie

For holding my newborn while she napped instead of laying her down in her crib. Mind ya business I'll hold my baby all I want. She's a newborn.

-Brittany

Being in the military. 

At first, I was looked down upon. “How could you leave your kids?”. No one said anything to my ex. He was military. My ex left me and if it wasn’t for the military my kids and I would’ve had no place to go.

-Naimah

My family belonged to our church for over 50 yrs. My then-fiance and I were together for 3 yrs when I got pregnant with our son. He was our miracle baby! Our rainbow! I had lost two babies prior to conceiving him. After my son was born, I went to the Pastor (a new pastor who had transferred here about 2 yrs prior)  to ask for his Blessing upon my child and to have him Christened in the Nazarene church. He looked me straight in the eye and told me he would NOT bless or Christen a BASTARD child 😭😭😭 I was so hurt and humiliated that I didn't go back to church again.

-Nikki

I've been told I should've aborted my son or institutionalized him at the very least because he has autism

-Courtney

The thing is though, the problem really doesn't lie with us moms! We are honestly just doing the best we can. People really need to learn to mind their own business. If you breastfeed or formula feed, co-sleep or sleep in separate rooms, stay at home or go to work, eat organic or buy your kids fast food...there is always someone thinking you're "doing it wrong." All we can do is try to respond with grace, wit, and maybe a few tears. Being a mom is just freaking hard!